Lately, there’s been a lot of eye-rolling over the whole “we’re a family here” thing at work. You’ve probably seen it too – companies proudly call themselves a family and people immediately cringe or run for the hills.
Why? Because it’s often a red flag. The assumption is when a company says that, what it really means is that you’ll work too much, get paid too little, and owe them your loyalty. And honestly, there’s some truth to that. There are definitely families – at home and at work – that you might rather avoid.
But it got me thinking…have we just lost sight of what “family” really means? Or have some workplaces just completely redefined it the wrong way?
love. unconditional love. trust. bond. roots. thick and thin. courage. support. teacher. tears. frustration. anger. pain. fear. loss. deceit. greed. lies. faith. hope. joy.
The negative perception didn’t appear out of nowhere. Many employees have experienced workplaces where “we’re a family” translated to blurred boundaries, unequal treatment, and being pressured to overcommit “for the team.” In those cases, family becomes code for burnout and guilt trips, not love or support.
Reclaiming What “Family” Really Means
When I think of family, I think of love, trust, courage, frustration, laughter, loss, and growth. It’s not always pretty, but it’s real. And honestly, my definition doesn’t change much at work. I’ve experienced every one of those emotions in my professional life too.
When you’re stressed out and on your last nerve – who’s beside you?
When you’re pulling a late night or working on a holiday – who’s still there?
When you land a huge win or hit a wall and cry at your desk – who’s there with the tissue box or the high five?
For me, that’s my work family.
Now don’t get me wrong – my actual family at home is always beside me too. But this is about the people you spend 40+ hours a week with. The ones who get it because they’re in the trenches with you.
The Meaning Behind the Phrase
Before writing off the idea of a “work family,” maybe it’s worth asking what someone really means when they say it. Do they mean shared purpose, care, belonging, and trust – or control, guilt, and long hours?
The concept of a work family isn’t inherently good or bad. It truly depends on what we mean by family and how we live it out. The phrase itself is not the problem – the culture behind it is.
When family means connection, trust, and support, it can be one of the best parts of work. Life's too short not to enjoy what you're doing and who you're doing it with. I'll always choose the kind of family that fights for each other, laughs together, and shows up even when things get hard. If you're not fulfilled by your work family, I hope you'll find one that does.
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